One Week
by seb343
Summary: Len Kagamine had never really noticed his sister's best friend Neru. Then he discovers she's coming to stay the week, with his parents away so it's just the three of them in the house. Rated M for bad language. And lots of sex references. LenXNeru
1. Day One

This is my first story, so apologies if it's not very good.

All characters belong to their respective owners and all that stuff.

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><p>I blinked drowsily as I was woken by a loud beeping. After a few seconds I realised it was the sound of an oven timer going off- someone was cooking. I glanced over at my sister's bed- we still shared a room at fourteen, to most people's surprise- and saw that it was empty. After a short while I forced myself to get up, and threw on some clothes. Where was Rin? For as long as I could remember she had relied on me to wake her up in the mornings. As if on cue, she burst into the room, her best friend Neru on her heels.<br>"You're finally awake then?" she asked sarcastically.  
>"What do you mean by that, Little Miss 'I'm too tired to go to school today Len, just let me sleep a bit longer'?"<br>"It's one o'clock!"  
>"'Do I have to get up now Len? There's still ten minutes until school starts, that's more than enough time to get ready.'"<br>I have to say, I thought my imitation of Rin's voice was very good. Apparently, however, she didn't agree.  
>"Fine, I just hope you're ready to be sleeping in the spare room tonight- Neru's sleeping over. So get out."<br>"Fine, fine. Where are mum and dad, anyway?"  
>"Upstairs."<br>"Doing what?"  
>"Guess. I'll give you a clue- it's something very tiring for them and loud enough to wake me up."<br>"Also sweaty." Neru piped in.  
>"Ew. I didn't need to know that."<br>"Feel sorry for me," she told me, "I walked in on them 'cause Rin made me guess what room the toilet was in!"  
>Rin chuckled, "I still don't get how you didn't know that already. You've been here loads of times."<br>I slipped out as they started arguing about whether or not Neru had ever actually used the toilet there or not. I made my way to the kitchen and grabbed a couple of bananas when Neru walked in.  
>"We're gonna go to the beach in a sec, Rin told me to ask you if you wanna come?"<br>"Sure, whatever."

Half an hour later, I was seriously regretting my decision. The circumstances which I had found myself in were marvellous, yes- on the beach with my sister's best friend who I had never realised looked so good in a bikini- but the problem was the direct result of that. A problem which had very quickly... arisen, is probably the best word for it,and which I had been forced to hide by lying on his front. It was less than comfortable, and I had a crappy view of the one thing I was trying to see- trying to ogle- but was better than the alternative. I was just considering buying an ice cream when my phone rang. Quickly I grabbed it and answered.  
>"Len, hi!"<br>"Oh, hi Mum."  
>"I'm just phoning to tell you me and your dad are going away for the week, starting tomorrow. We made some arrangements with Neru's parents and Neru will be staying for the week! All three of you together for the week! I'm sure you'll have loads of fun!"<br>"Wait, so Neru is staying over for the whole week?"  
>"Yes, honey. Come home soon!"<br>Well, that was just great. As if it wasn't going to be bad enough tonight, I would be stuck with two girls for the whole week. Normally this would be perfect, but in this case one girl was my sister and the other would probably knock me out if I tried making a move on her. In fact, she definitely would- I remembered when Mikuo had tried it a few years ago. He hadn't been able to walk properly for two days. There was only one hope- flaunting the gift that I possessed known to man as a six-pack. I stood up and checked to make sure there was no noticeable bulge at my crotch, before making my way to the ice cream stand. Two ice creams in hand, I took a second to ready myself and walked over to where Neru and Rin were sunbathing. Kneeling down I whipped the sunglasses off Neru's face, to her surprise. Sitting up quickly, her long blonde ponytail caught me in the face and I took the moment to inhale her scent (and then reflect on how creepy that sounded) before thrusting the ice cream at her.  
>"Happy birthday, oh wonderful one. I come bearing gifts of which Kaito would be jealous."<br>As if on cue, a cry of "MY ICE CREAM IS MELTING! MELTING! OH WHY GOD, WHY?" came from further down the beach. Rin shot up in surprise.  
>"What? What's happening? Why did you wake me up so early? Why is my bed so uncomfor- Oh, yeah, we're at the beach!"<br>"I have some marvellous news for you two!" I told them sarcastically.  
>"What?" Neru asked- Rin had laid back down and was ignoring the world again.<br>"You get to stay for the whole week, with just me and Rin. Mum and Dad are going away and your parents said they wanted you to stay at our house for the week."  
>"That was kind of them. Can you see how valued I am as a child?"<br>"I'm sure there are lots of people that value you." Damn it- that was clumsy. I quickly stifled a blush and continued on, "Not as much as they value my six-pack, of course."  
>She grabbed her sunglasses, wiped some sand off of them and gave me a long, hard stare.<br>"Do you know just how douchebaggy you sound right now?"  
>"Is douchebaggy actually a word?"<br>"Do you have any idea how little of a shit anyone gives?"  
>"That was rude."<br>"So was bringing up your six-pack in normal conversation."  
>"Oh, I can assure you, this conversation is far better than normal."<br>"If you don't back off I will kick you in the balls far harder than I kicked your friend Mikuo."  
>I tried to think of something good to say, thought of nothing, and backed off. No one else had reacted like that when I flirted with them. Why was Neru different? Oh well. I had a week to work on her. I hurried to give the second ice cream to Rin and went back to sunbathing. It was going to be a fun week, I could tell.<p>

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><p>Please leave some reviews, constructive criticism is welcomed. No flaming please. Thanks for reading.<p> 


	2. Day Two: School

Once again, I own none of the characters in this story.  
>Yay for Len being physically harmed!<p>

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><p>I knocked on the door to what usually would be me and Rin's room. "Are you two awake? We've got school today."<br>A few seconds later the door swung open and Neru walked out carrying her uniform and a towel, wearing her pyjamas. They, I noticed, had fluffy pink bunnies on, not at all fitting with how Neru normally acted. Her hair was a mess.  
>"You get up too early." she told me sleepily.<br>"No, you go to sleep too late. Now hurry up."  
>"Screw you."<br>I grinned, "If you really want to, but I didn't realise we were at that stage of our relationship."  
>The grin disappeared when Neru's foot hit my crotch. Now I knew how Mikuo felt.<br>"Ahh! Bollocks!"  
>"Yep, that's where I kicked you." A smirk on her face, she strolled smugly away for a second then turned around.<br>"What room is the shower in again?"  
>I pointed weakly at the bathroom, "In there... I can show you how to turn it on if you like."<br>"I know how to turn a shower on, thanks."  
>"I wasn't talking about the shower," I told her, winking. She just shook her head in disgust and closed the door. After waiting a bit for the pain to subside, I went and made myself some breakfast, banana juice and a bowl of cereal. At the same time I put some bread in the toaster, knowing Rin would be too disorganised to make herself breakfast.<br>"Where's Neru?"  
>"Shower. I've put some toast on for you."<br>"Thanks," Rin answered, grabbing a carton of orange juice from the fridge and pouring herself a glass, "I'm gonna go use the shower in Mum and Dad's room."  
>I nodded to tell her I was listening, then but was more absorbed reading the newspaper. There was nothing interesting, but my history teacher had told our class to read the newspaper to try and find something "that people will be taught about in a hundred years!". I'd found nothing- the biggest headline was about some footballer cheating on his ex-wife's sister's (also an ex-wife) daughter (probably soon to be an ex-wife, once a step-daughter). Somehow, I didn't think schools would be teaching that in a hundred years. After skimming a few more stories and finishing my cereal, I dropped the newspaper and noticed the toast was done. Knowing Rin would forget (actually, Rin would probably forget to eat it at all) I put it on a plate, buttered it and went to watch some TV. Barely a minute later, Neru walked in with her hair damp but at least styled into her normal side ponytail, looking better than earlier. She was eating the toast I had left on the kitchen table.<br>"That's Rin's toast."  
>She shrugged, "It's good. She makes good toast."<br>"No she doesn't. She burns it. It tastes like charcoal. I made that toast for her."  
>"Oh. Well done you."<br>She took a few more bites of the toast before settling the plate on the arm of the sofa and whipping out her phone. Her fingers started flying across the keys and I doubted she would respond if I said something. She was still at it ten minutes later when Rin walked in.  
>"It's eight o'clock, we should probably go now."<br>"You're probably right."  
>"Okay. Neru, come on."<br>She stuffed the phone into her pocket and followed us out of the door.  
>"Do we have assembly today or not? I can't remember," Rin asked me as I locked up behind us.<br>"It's Monday, so yeah we do. We'd better not be late."

We were late, of course. Only a minute after the bell had gone, and our year group was lined up ready to head into the hall. I headed over to Mikuo's place in the line whilst Neru and Rin went to the back. We began to file into the hall.  
>"You're late."<br>"My heart bleeds for you, waiting all on your own for me. Did you remember your swimming stuff?"  
>"Of course. I'm not an idiot!"<br>One of the teachers glared at us and we shut up. As always, the assembly was boring. The one good point was the chairs. Half of the year group got comfy chairs with armrests and all, the other simple plastic ones. Me and Mikuo had got the comfy ones. Rin and Neru weren't so lucky. After half an hour of ignoring the teachers who were obviously trying to teach us a very valuable lesson which we were going to use oh so many times in later life and laughing at Rin and Neru, we were finally allowed to leave. Ten minutes later, I was stood with Mikuo, Rin, Neru and Haku Yowane, one of Rin and Neru's friends, at the poolside waiting for the teacher to let us get in.  
>"We will be playing matches of Water Polo today. Three people to a side. At the deep end, Rin Kagamine, Len Kagamine and Mikuo Hatsune, you will be one team. You may get into the pool now. You will be playing against Neru Akita, Haku Yowane and Honne Dell. You'll notice I've put you with your friends this lesson. Don't make me regret it. Second match, you will..."<br>I jumped into the pool next to Rin, who was shaking out her now wet hair. On the other side of the pool, Honne blew Yaku a kiss and grinned. He had the ball.  
>"How's that song go? 'When we're together, baby, we're unstoppable'? Something like that."<br>Mikuo, however, grabbed the ball from Honne's hands with surprisingly good timing, "Nope, you guys are definitely stoppable!"  
>Neru frowned at her teammates, "Nice job, you lost the ball. I'll show you how it's done."<br>Mikuo was swimming towards their goal when Neru tackled him. I'm not really sure if you're supposed to tackle people in Water Polo, or if attacking would be a more apt word than tackling, but she got the ball.  
>"Hah! Take it, bitch! Take it like a man!"<br>Rin narrowed her eyes at Neru, "Oh, it's on now!"  
>Neru dropped the ball in the water as both started laughing uncontrollably. Apparently, Haku got the joke as well, which meant we had an advantage- two of their team had been struck by a sudden bout of hilarity, only one of ours! I quickly snatched the ball from Neru, who cried in surprise and tried to grab my leg, and swam quickly towards the goal when another ball hit me in the face.<br>"Shit! That fucking hurt!"  
>Honne was laughing his ass off as Teto Kasane swam over from her game to get the ball. I guess my attempt at getting a goal was ruined now.<br>"Sorry Len! My stupid idiots of a team can't throw a ball straight!"  
>After about twenty more minutes of Water Polo the teacher stopped us again.<br>"Now I want you to all get out of the pool. I'll be pairing all of you up so that you can practice your throwing and catching- remember, you only hold the ball with one hand in Water Polo. Neru Akita, You will be working with the one Kagamine twin who ever seems to pay attention in these lessons. Might I remind you that you should not be wearing a bikini in these lessons. If you wear one again next lesson I will have to set you a detention. Have fun with Len. Haku Yowane, you can work with your lovely boyfriend. Maybe you can get used to the fact he has a six pack so you will stop fawning over him in my lessons..."  
>The teacher's moaning speech continued for what felt like hours until she let us back into the pool. By then, about two minutes were left in the lesson until it finished and what I had expected to be some wonderful quality time with Neru (if by quality time you mean a chain of events which would end with me being physically harmed) ended up as getting into the pool, throwing a ball twice and getting out again. The day after that was completely uneventful. I "helped" Rin with some questions in maths, by telling her the answer to every single question in the test, and narrowly avoided being attacked by Neru whilst buying lunch. Now I had the rest of the day to spend with just Rin and Neru. Things were going to go very well, I could tell. No way anything would go wrong and end with me being kicked in the balls. No way at all.<p> 


	3. Day Two: Party Time

Once again, I own none of the characters.  
>Sorry I took so long updating this time, I was sick from Monday to Wednesday and so didn't get much done. I'll make the next update very soon for you though.<br>Thanks for all the reviews.

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><p>"Len, hurry up and get ready!"<br>"What for?"  
>"It's Miku's birthday party today, idiot!"<br>"I thought that was next week!"  
>"So did everyone else, now come on!"<br>I got up off my bed and turned off the old T.V. that we kept in the spare room, and quickly headed downstairs.  
>"Rin, where's my suit?"<br>"Wardrobe in our room."  
>Before long I was opening the door to our room. In hindsight, it was a stupid move. I should definitely have knocked first. However, it was too late for that and so I was greeted by the sight of Neru changing. She was facing away from the door, and was just slipping her bra off when I opened the door. She turned to the bed- what was normally my bed- to put it down when she saw me. Her arms went up to cover her chest and we made eye contact, staring into each others eyes and connecting for the first time and-<br>"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? GET OUT YOU PERVERTED WEIRDO! GET THE FUCK OUT!"  
>Okay, maybe not that much of a connection. I quickly slipped out.<br>"How long until I can come in and get my suit?"  
>"It's a bit bloody late for that!" came the reply, "Now piss off, dickhead!"<br>I turned to Rin, "Can you go get it?"  
>She nodded and ventured bravely inside.<br>"Why the hell are you coming in agai- Oh, it's you."  
>"I'm just getting Len's suit. Like he was trying to do."<br>"Tell him to knock next time."  
>Rin walked back out a few seconds later with my suit, and thrust it into my arms.<br>"Thanks."  
>"No problem. Why the hell is this party so posh anyway?"<br>"Because Kaito's parents planned it and paid for it."  
>After ten minutes we were all ready to go.<br>"So... how are we supposed to be getting there again?" Rin asked.  
>Neru grinned at her, "I thought of that. Haku's parents booked us a limo. I texted her earlier to check." She finished her speech by glaring at me. Still not forgiven, I guess.<p>

A few minutes later (I had a banana while we waited) Haku's limo arrived, Haku and Dell Honne, her ever-present boyfriend, inside, and we headed to the party. I hadn't realised until then that they were holding it at Kaito's house. Nor had I realised just how huge Kaito's house was. Then I grinned to myself. Sad as it was, I had a feeling it would look awesome when me, Dell, Haku, Rin and Neru got out of the limo. Very posh, very awesome. I glanced over at the door as one of the Shion family's many servants (seriously, they're fucking loaded) opened the door for us. Dell grinned at him and put on a posh accent, "Well, thank you my good man!"  
>The servant just glared at him, "Get out of the limo, kid."<br>He did so, followed by Haku and then me. I was greeted by Mikuo.  
>"Hey, Len! High five!"<br>I high fived him, for no particular reason, and he led me to the ballroom (seriously, a ballroom! The Shion family is really old money), where Kaito and Miku were dancing in the centre. Kaito's parents were watching enthusiastically- Miku's, not so much. Mikuo turned to me, "Where's Rin?"  
>"Over with Teto and Haku."<br>"Where are they?"  
>"Outside. Why do you want to know?"<br>He grinned, "Miku isn't the only Hatsune who's going to be getting romantic tonight."  
>"You fancy my sister?"<br>"No, I fancy my sister, isn't it obvious?" he replied sarcastically, "Anyway, fancying isn't the right word. I just think she's hot."  
>"Two things. One, that's my sister you're talking about. Two, you fancy her. Three, I'll get Rin ready for you if you find someone for me to dance with. Deal?"<br>"That was three things. But it's a deal anyway. Let's roll."

About five minutes later, I had left Mikuo trying to think of someone for me to dance with and was chatting with Rin.  
>"So, what do you think of the party?"<br>"It's boring. Boring music, boring entertainment, and boring drinks because we're too young to have alcohol."  
>I pushed her out onto the dance floor near where Mikuo was, "You find someone to dance with, maybe it'll make you change your mind."<br>As she disappeared into the crowd, I saw Mikuo pushing another girl out at me. I didn't get the chance to see much of her before she was in my arms. A chill ran through me as I saw she was blonde- if Mikuo had thrust Neru at me, I would kill him.  
>"Wow, you have a surprisingly nice six-pack for some random guy."<br>I realised her hands were on my chest, and that it was Neru's voice speaking to me.  
>"I wonder if your face is just as nice- Oh fuck."<br>"It's Mikuo's fault."  
>I noticed that she didn't try to take her hands off my chest, "Explain to me how, exactly, it is Mikuo's fault ."<br>"Well, he fancies Rin and so I made a deal with him that I could get Rin to dance with him if he found me someone to dance with and so he found me you, apparently."  
>I noticed that I still had my arms around her as well. So did she, and she pushed them away, taking her hands off my chest.<br>"Why should I believe you?"  
>"Because if you don't I will demand that I am allowed to put my hands on your chest for as long as you had yours on mine."<br>I instinctively moved my hands to protect my crotch, but we were distracted by Haku and Dell, who pushed past us as if we weren't there.  
>"Where the hell are they going? Hey-"<br>I put my finger to her lips, "Somehow, I think they are trying to find somewhere a little more private right now."  
>Neru frowned, "Great, now I have no one to do anything with. Rin's too busy fawning over Mikuo."<br>"There's always the sexy beast that is me."  
>"And Teto. Teto seems like a better choice right now."<br>"But what about the sexy beast that is me? You know you want to stay with me!"  
>Neru grinned at me, "Okay, maybe five minutes."<br>I was about to say something to reply when Rin ran up to us. (Rin ran, that's awesome alliteration, just like awesome alliteration! If only everyone else knew how witty my internal monologue is!)  
>"Okay, we're leaving."<br>"Why?"  
>"Because I said so, Neru. Come on. Anyway, it's late and we've got school again tomorrow and it will take ages to walk home so we should leave now. Come on."<br>She dragged us away, clearly annoyed about something (Rin would always try to go to bed as late as possible, and here she is trying to go early) but not saying what. But what she was saying made sense, and I couldn't be bothered to argue. So we left. And after about an hour of stumbling around in the dark, we got home. The party was kind of shit.


	4. Day Three: No School

This chapter has a bit less of Len being physically harmed. What it does have is flirting, (attempts at) shagging and no school. As you should be able to tell from the title.  
>Once again, I own none of the characters.<br>Please leave reviews, for every review I'll spend ten more minutes writing the next chapter instead of playing Modern Warfare 3!

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><p>I looked out of the window at the rain pouring down the streets. It was 11:30 am and school had been called off because it had flooded. I'd never seen it rain so hard in my life, but I wasn't complaining. We'd spent about five minutes at school before the rain started leaking through the roof, and Neru- whose classroom was on the top floor. So now she was lying in what would normally be my bed (I'm never going to let go the fact she took my bed- I love that bed) with a cold. Oh, and Neru had had to go back into school for her clearly very important mock exams. Despite the fact we aren't having the real exams for another two years. Really, my school is full of idiots.<p>

"Len, come watch T.V. with me!"  
>That was the third time she had asked that. I decided, against my better judgement, to say yes this time.<br>"Len, hurry up!"  
>"Okay, okay. I'm just coming."<br>I opened the door to see her laid on the bed (still my bed), the covers up to her neck. The T.V. mounted on the wall in view of both my and Rin's beds was turned to one of those stupid talent shows. The X Factor or whatever.  
>"Len, get the remote for me."<br>It was on the bedside table (my bedside table), in arms reach for her. I got it anyway.  
>"We're not watching this rubbish."<br>"But one of the boys in it is hot! He's singing now!" she protested.  
>"If you want to see hot people, you have me."<br>She muttered something I couldn't quite hear, probably telling me I was lucky she was sick or else she'd kill me. She's nice and friendly like that. I changed the channel  
>despite her trying to grab the remote out of my hands, but there wasn't anything good on. At all. Stupid, crappy daytime shows.<br>"Can we watch a movie?"  
>I glanced over at Neru to see she was holding one of Rin's favourite movies. It was about a vampire, a werewolf, and a girl who has problems making her mind up. You can probably gather the rest from there.<br>"You can watch it. I'm going to go make lunch."  
>"Isn't it a bit early?"<br>"I'll take any alternative to watching that film. Bye!"  
>I slipped back out of the room and headed to the kitchen to make soup. Nothing fancy. Banana soup, maybe. But Neru doesn't like bananas. Tomato soup, then. Everyone likes tomato soup. Before long I was back in me and Rin's room, a bowl of tomato soup in hand. The T.V. was still off. I guess Neru couldn't be bothered to get out of bed.<br>"Oh, you actually made something."  
>"Of course. How could I resist making something for someone so lovely and beautiful?"<br>I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of insults, but none came.  
>"How come you're so nice to me?"<br>I winked at her, "Cause I wanna get in your pants. Here, eat the soup."  
>She didn't take the soup, so I put it on the bedside table as she asked, "So, what was that about wanting to get in my pants?"<br>"Oh, flirting back now are we?"  
>"Oh, being condescending now, are we?"<br>"Oh, getting annoyed now, are we?"  
>"Oh, failing to come up with a good comeback now, are we?"<br>"Wait, was that saying I didn't have a good comeback or saying you didn't have a good comeback?"  
>Neru grinned, "Take a guess."<br>"Well, that's completely unhelpful."  
>"Just let me eat this soup in peace. I'm sure it's quite good."<br>Sitting down on the edge of the bed, I leaned in closer to Neru, "Ah, I think you will find I am a man of many talents, my dear."  
>"My dear? Oh dear Len. Oh dear."<br>"You don't seem to be pushing me away."  
>"That's 'cause I'm sick. I can't lift stuff as heavy as you."<br>"Ouch. You wounded my pride. I must have revenge."  
>Quickly I climbed into the bed next to Neru.<br>"Why did you just get into bed with me?"  
>"You'll see." I grinned to myself as I put my arms around her waist.<br>"Hey. Don't move your hands any lower."  
>"How about higher?"<br>"Do you really need to ask?"  
>"I'm going to take that as meaning yes." I replied in a singsong voice as I moved my hands up slightly. She jumped out of the bed quickly, or rather tried to. I still had my arms around her, however, and both of us ended up falling onto the floor, me on top of her. She was wearing only her bra and knickers, which had a matching polka dot pattern on.<br>"It didn't mean yes, did it?" I asked. Neru tried to stop herself from smiling, but couldn't quite. So, trying to hide said smile, she headbutted me. It probably wouldn't have hurt so much if I hadn't been leaning in at the same moment, but it was enough to get me off her.  
>"Ouch. That hurt. What did I ever do to you?"<br>"What, apart from try to grab my boobs?"  
>"It was only a joke. Anyway, you seemed like you wanted it," She raised her fist and I threw my arms up defensively, "Joke, joke!"<br>She was probably about to hit me when the door swung open. Rin and Mikuo stumbled in- well, actually just Mikuo stumbled in, Rin's legs were around his waist. Yeah. That's my sister there, her lips all over my best friend's face, her legs around his waist and her skirt hitched up whilst I'm lying on the ground cowering in fear of a girl in her bra and knickers. Kind of awkward. The situation was only made worse when Mikuo dropped Rin onto the floor upon seeing us. She fell onto Neru, who fell onto me, leaving trapped underneath my sister and a very scantily clad Neru. The whole "sister" part is the bad part, of course. Oh, and Mikuo being in the room. Just stood there in shock.  
>"Mikuo," I said weakly, "Next time you try to shag my sister, do it right. I was really getting somewhere with Neru."<br>She hissed in my ear, probably trying to say something. But Rin was surprisingly heavy, and my knee was in her stomach to stop her from saying anything. Then, just for fun, I winked at her.  
>What a fun day I've had. Although, at least Neru never actually technically hurt me. I must be making progress!<p> 


	5. Day Four: Our First Kiss How Sweet!

Here's the next chapter for you. Sorry it took so long, all of my teachers have decided that since Christmas is coming, everyone should get extra homework to do in the lead-up to the holidays. I had about three big projects to do with a group and two on my own. It's been very time consuming, but now I've got all of the Christmas holidays to waste so I'll update again soon.  
>Read and review please!<p>

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><p>After the awkward moment of the last day, we were all back at school, school were the floors squelched when you walked on them because they were still waterlogged and where Gakupo was teaching our class. Which was actually good. Gakupo Kamui's his name, substitute teaching's his game! But seriously, he looks like more of a girl than Rin. And he keeps trying to get us to call him Mr. Kamui instead of Gakupo. Did I mention he seriously pervs on Miss Megurine? He does. We're young children, we shouldn't see those candid pictures that he has as his bloody screensaver on his laptop. But apart from that, he's quite fun and generally lets us do what we want. For example, in this supposed science lesson the only science going on was Haku and Dell having some lessons on 'human anatomy' at the back of the class. Neru, as always, had her phone out, and Rin was sat in the set one science class away from all us set three retards, with Mikuo. Teto was in set five. Bottom set. She's kind of a dumbass. I mean, there's like seven people in that class. My class has twenty-five and Rin's has about thirty.<br>"Mr. Kamui, how's your lesson going?"  
>Miss Megurine was stood leaning against the door smiling suggestively at Gakupo. He was sat at his laptop, undoubtedly looking at pictures of the very woman now in front of him. Once again, young, corruptible minds! Not all of us have libidos as hyperactive as Haku and Dell!<br>"Oh, it's nothing compared to the lesson I'll teach you tonight, Miss Megurine. I know how to keep my students under control!"  
>"Well that's good, because I've been a very naughty girl!"<br>I was about to make some comment to Piko Utatane, who I don't really know very well but have been sat next to in science lessons since the start of the year, when everyone's thoughts were interrupted by a loud scream from the back of the class, followed by whispering voices. I could just about hear what they were saying.  
>"Keep it down!"<br>"Sorry, you surprised me! Tell me next time you do something like that."  
>"Okay, so-"<br>"I didn't say stop!"  
>Haku and Dell then. Piko turned back to Miss Megurine and Gakupo- he never really said much. Probably 'cause if he said something a load of dickheads would start making cracks about him sounding like a girl. I was thankful when the lesson was over. Next- oh wait, more science. Double lessons are shit. On the other hand, our normal teacher, known to us only as Meiko, no surname provided, was back. And slightly drunk. After screaming at Miss Megurine and Gakupo to, and I quote, "Get the fuck out of my classroom and at least wait until school's over to fulfill your kinky fantasies!" and then realising she actually had a class to teach, she told us we were going to spend the lesson learning about plants. She then sorted us into pairs and gave us leaves to examine under a microscope (Yay! Fun!). I got stuck with Neru, mainly 'cause me, Haku and Dell are the only ones in the class she knows and Haku and Dell were still busy. Yeah.<br>"Okay everyone, if you just wanna, *hic*, look at those leaves, I'm gonna do some paperwork."  
>There was the distinct sound of bottles clinking as she spoke.<br>"Len. Give me your chair so I can sit down."  
>"Why don't you have your own chair, my lovely sweet Neru?"<br>A cry of "Get in there Len!" came from across the classroom, courtesy of Iroha Nekomura.  
>"Shut it, Hello Kitty-girl!" Neru replied, throwing a ball of paper at her. It missed. Before I could react, Neru sat down on top of me.<br>"Get off!"  
>She wriggled her arse around a bit, not unpleasantly I must say, then pouted at me, "I gave you the chance. It's my seat now."<br>"Look at Neru, getting in there with Len! Go on!"  
>That was Iroha again. Neru jumped off me and then pulled the chair out from under me. I got to spend the rest of the lesson standing. After that I wasn't in any of Neru's classes- History was quite good, but apart from that the day was boring.<p>

Not so much when I got home. Walking in the door, I was greeted by Rin (who had got home before me somehow) with the words "Len, we're making Banoffee pie."  
>"Uh, why?"<br>"Because Neru has never, ever had it before. She is clearly a very deprived child and so we must show her how amazing Banoffee pies are. Also, you're making it. Have fun!"  
>Aren't sisters lovely? I set about gathering the necessary ingredients (bananas, toffee, butter and biscuits- it's not hard to make) and began the first part of the process. Beating the biscuits into a pulp. Easy. That done, I put an appropriate amount of butter into a bowl and then microwaved it for about half a minute, before adding the biscuits. Chopping up the bananas was the next step, and I grabbed the left-over pieces for myself. After that, I layered on the toffee and put them in to fridge ready to eat later. They're desserts, even if they are called pies. I left for literally about two seconds to check if there was any mail, which I normally would have done as soon as I got in, but, of course, I had been jumped by Rin, and came back to find Neru stood next to the fridge with a guilty look on her face.<br>"Have you been swiping some of the toffee from the tin?"  
>She shook her head. (Blatant lies!)<br>"I don't believe you."  
>"Why not? Do you not trust me?"<br>"Not so much. Maybe if you were a little nicer to me."  
>"Aww, poor little Lenny-wenny, did I hurt your feelings."<br>I had been slowly moving towards her throughout our conversation, and now I was close enough to strike. Quickly I strode up to her and grabbed her arms before thrusting my mouth onto hers. She squealed in surprise (Cutest. Thing. Ever. Of all time.) for the split second she could before I muffled any noise she tried to make, and soon relaxed into my arms. Guess she doesn't hate me that much after all. Come on! Using my tongue to force my way into her mouth, not that she resisted that much, I found what I had came for. Just as she really seemed to start enjoying it, I broke off the kiss with a playful wink.  
>"Your mouth tastes of toffee, my dear little Neru."<br>Her eyes widened in surprise for a second, but I didn't get to see what happened next because I was too busy collapsing to the floor, writhing in pain. Guess I forgot about that particular aspect of my dear little Neru's personality.


	6. Day Five: A Trip to the Aquarium

To make up for the late Christmas present for all of my great readers (that present being this chapter), I have given you an extra long chapter featuring lots of romance and stuff. Also, vodka and embarrassing nicknames for Gakupo. Read on!

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><p>I stared sullenly out of the window of the coach, watching the busy motorway with no enthusiasm. A school trip to the aquarium was the day plan, and of course it was raining. Even worse, Rin hadn't got a place on the trip, so I was sat next to Neru. With us having had to get to school an hour earlier than usual so the coach could avoid the traffic, she was very tired. And the coach hadn't avoided the traffic. It was 10:30 and we were supposed to have got to the beach at 9:30. On the other hand, Neru had fallen asleep and was now laying down on my shoulder in the cutest manner possible. This had not escaped the notice of Iroha Nekomura, who was watching me like a hawk to see me do something soppy and lovey-dovey. No chance.<br>"Hey, Len!"  
>I looked up to see Iroha leaning over the back of her seat.<br>"You know what? You and Neru should go out!"  
>"Really? You know what? You should leave me alone."<br>I turned back to look at Neru, still leaning on my shoulder, and discovered our faces were very nearly touching. I realised my mistake nearly instantly, but it was already too late. I felt the palm of Iroha's hand smashing into the back of my head and then I was kissing Neru. And not intentionally like last time. After a few seconds of our lips touching, she pushed me away, having just woken up. She stared at me expectantly for about five seconds before speaking.  
>"Right, Len isn't being a douchebag. I must be dreaming, right?"<br>Iroha nodded emphatically, a massive grin on her face. "Yes, you are actually."  
>"Uh-"<br>"Shut up, dream Len! I'm trying to talk to dream Iroha!"  
>"This dream, Neru, is your subconscious trying to convince you to stop being so bloody violent around Len and just ask him out. For the purposes of this, we have a non-douchebaggy Len here for you." Iroha took a second to wink at me before continuing, "Go wild with him, mon ami."<br>"Ooh, Neru's subconscious knows French! Ooh la la!"  
>"Shut up Te- Dream Teto!"<br>Iroha ducked back down behind her seat and a few seconds later her iPhone- more importantly, her iPhone with a camera- popped up in her place. I stuck my middle  
>finger up at it and it disappeared. She popped back up again.<br>"Neru, you can do anything you want now. We won't judge you! You can do anything with Len, you can do anything _to_ Len, anywhere you want. Like how Haku likes doing it in public places, or Teto with whips."  
>"Iroha, you promised you wouldn't tell anyone about that!" Teto cried quickly, and grabbed Iroha's ponytail. Neru was watching in bemused silence. As they struggled, my Maths teacher, Mr. Hiyama, came up to us.<br>"Mr. Hiyama, what are you doing in my dream?"  
>I facepalmed as he stared at her as if she was mad, but then shook his head, "So it's your dream, that explains why Mrs. Utatane was being so... insistent last night, I mean she's a very nice woman but I have a girlfriend thank you, and no for the last time I don't want another bottle of wine and really I don't think it's a good idea for you to have it alone, because it will be your sixth tonight and that's really not healthy and whilst it was very nice of you to invite me to your house it's very nearly midnight now and really you should let me leave, because-"<br>He was cut off by Gakupo, who took him aside, "Kiyoteru, what are you doing?"  
>"Well, it's very interesting you see we're really just all part of Neru's dream apparently-"<br>Gakupo, like me, facepalmed, and led Mr. Hiyama away from us by the arm, shooting Neru a look of pure venom as he did so. When he sat back down, Miss Megurine came over and sat on his lap. I quickly looked away so as to protect my innocence. Hah! As if I have any!  
>"Sooo~ Dream Lenny, what do ya wanna do now?"<br>I looked back to see Neru tugging at my shirt. How did I not notice that?  
>Teto shot back up from the pair of seats in front of us and injected her peculiar charm into the conversation.<br>"Another of Haku's things is not wearing bras so her boobs jiggle about all the time. I mean, sure, she says it's because she can't find a bra big enough, but Dell bought her one for her birthday and I've only seen her wear that once and she wasn't wearing it for long, if you get what I mean. Not that I stalk her or anything."  
>There was brief pause followed by "Only Dell!" and Teto disappearing again.<br>Neru stared at where Teto had been then turned back to me.  
>"This isn't a dream, is it?"<br>"Have you only just realised?"  
>"Well, I only realised because Haku actually does wear bras. Being her best friend, I have inside knowledge of this, and my subconscious lying to me just doesn't make sense!"<br>"What else about this makes sense? Also, you have no idea how creepy yet incredibly sexy the idea of you having inside knowledge about Haku wearing bras sounds."  
>Neru slapped me, but it was more playful than anything and that was a good sign.<br>"I'm tired, going to sleep."  
>She rested her head on my shoulder again, and closed her eyes. I brushed her long, silky ponytail out of my face where she had unwittingly flung it and neatly folded it into a pillow for her, lifting her head delicately to slide it into place. She smiled in the cutest way imaginable (I do like saying she does things in "the cutest way ...able", don't I?) and put an arm around me. I'm sure it's only because she's tired and that she will forget all about this by the time she wakes up.<p>

I gently shook Neru to wake her up. It was now 12:00 and we had finally arrived at the aquarium. It didn't work, but Iroha screaming at Teto did. We all marched out of the coach and lined up outside of the aquarium where Gakupo gave us a little speech about how he expected us all to make the school proud. How boring. Then he told us we had to get into "groups of four or more people"- me and Neru went with Haku and Dell, and then Teto and Iroha came over and joined us. What a lovely little band of schoolchildren, right? Then, we finally got to actually go into the aquarium.  
>"Wow, fish, I'm so excited." said Dell to no one in particular. Teto and Iroha grinned at each other and then broke out singing:<br>"We, we, we so excited, we so excited! We gonna have a ball today!"  
>I think everyone in the aquarium shot them a glare at exactly the same time, including the security guards (seriously, what is there to guard in an aquarium? Oh no, someone stole my fish!) and they quickly stop there rendition of the song. On the other hand, it was better than the original!<br>Haku sighed quietly to herself as Teto and Iroha led us down a long hallway lined with fish-enclosure-things (this is the technical term, of course), something which Dell noticed and so dropped from in front of me and Neru to behind us with Haku. Teto turned round, saw us and squeed. There is no other word to describe the sound she made- it was that sound of pure glee girls make when they, say, discover a new Twilight movie is out.  
>"What?" Iroha asked, clearly as disturbed by the noise as the rest of us.<br>"Len and Neru look so cute together!"  
>We both looked at each other and jumped apart on realising how close we had been to each other. Teto grinned, "You two should go out! It would be so cute!"<br>I glanced over at Neru, who grinned and said "She's right."  
>"Okay."<br>Neru scowled at me, "No, wait, I was just doing an impression of you were you say something like that to be a douche and-"  
>"And now you're going out with said douche. Problem?"<br>Teto squeed again, and Iroha had her phone out. She held it up triumphantly to my face.  
>"There, your Facebook has been updated. It's official."<br>Neru glared at me and I grinned back. It didn't escape my notice that she was blushing in the cutest way possible (I keep saying that, don't I?).  
>"Now kiss!" Teto sang happily, then she and Iroha broke into chorus.<br>Or began to- Neru beat them to it, starting to sing a song we'd all found on Youtube of Miss Megurine singing.  
>"Just be friends, all we gotta do just be friends!"<br>Teto and Iroha stared at her incredulously as she sung, and I stepped closer towards her.  
>"Time to say goodbye, just be friends, just be friends, just be friends!"<br>Smiling, I put my arms slowly around her as soon as she finished singing.  
>"I disagree, my dear Neru. I think we should be far more than friends."<br>I quickly moved my arms from around her to over my crotch, but was pleasantly surprised to find she instead leant in closer and kissed me.  
>"D'aww, how sweet!" Teto crooned.<br>"Why the fuck is Len holding his balls?" Dell asked.  
>"Who was playing my song?" Miss Megurine screeched at the top of her voice, followed by "Luka, dear, please calm down!"<br>"But Gakky-poo, they got it all wrong!"  
>"Don't call me that in public!"<br>"You didn't mind last night, Gakky-poo!"  
>"It's- it's embarrassing."<br>"Waah! Why do you hate me so much! I though you loved me! Maybe we should just be friends after all!"  
>"I knew that letting you near vodka was a bad idea!"<br>Me and Neru's long, sweet, loving kiss was broken by Iroha's uncontrollable laughter.  
>"Gakky-poo! Oh my god, that's just too funny!"<br>Teto, too was laughing, "Hahaha! That's hilarious! Vodka! Lololol!  
>"What's so funny about vodka?" Haku asked what we were all thinking.<br>"Well, I was reading the newspaper earlier and it said the Russian economy is a joke and me being the smart person that I am know that vodka is Russian and if one thing that's Russian is a joke than vodka must be funny somewhere along the line."  
>"Uh..." was the unanimous response from everyone apart from me and Neru, who galnced at each other. Neru, apparently, had not been paying attention.<br>"Uh, what are we talking about?"  
>"Ah, I guess you were too absorbed in your kiss to be paying any attention to what was happening."<br>Neru blushed as Iroha began explaining what had happened, however she was cut short by Mr. Hiyama coming up to us and telling us that it was time to head back, or else "we'll be back late which would be very bad because I have a date with my girlfriend tonight- have I told you about my girlfriend, she's very nice, but anyway I have a date despite Mrs. Utatane's attempts to get me to cancel it last night, I can't imagine why I mean she's married and has a son, you know Piko right, very good student- sorry, am I rambling on again?"  
>Very good teacher, Mr. Hiyama, but he does have a bit of a problem with the concept of breaking paragraphs into different sentences and he can't take a hint to save his life.<p>

About one and a half hours later I was awoken by a cry of despair which I recognised as coming from Iroha. I found myself entangled in the arms of one particularly beautiful Hello Kitty-fangirl. Hah, I'm joking of course, I was entangled in the arms of my lovely, new, still-sleeping girlfriend. Teto. Still kidding, hah hah hah, I'm so hilarious. Sorry, I'll stop that now. Anyway, I carefully removed myslef from her grip to realise that we were still on the coach, albeit nearly home. Leaning forward, I decided, to listen to the conversation between the two people sat in the seats ahead of the lovely couple of which I am but half.  
>"So, yeah, turns out it's impossible to get pregnant if it's a woman putting her thingy into a man's thingy so my mum shouldn't be having another baby any time soon, but no guarantees."<br>I don't even wanna know what Teto was talking about then, but I was dragged into the conversation by Iroha, who noticed I was awake.  
>"Len, thank god! This is torture! She's been telling me about her parents' sex lives!"<br>"They tell me about it, I tell you about it! If I have to listen to it you can too!"  
>"Why? They're not my parents!"<br>"Well, I'm sorry!" Teto cried dramatically, throwing her hands in the air. There was a brief silence, then "Butt plugs! That was the thingy she puts in his thingy!"  
>Another cry of despair came from Iroha, and I heard Neru shifting restlessly.<br>"Sshh! You'll wake Neru up!"  
>"Len, no! Just let me stay in bed a bit longer!"<br>"What the fuck is she dreaming about?"  
>Teto chuckled, "Her and Len in bed! Ooh la la!"<br>"Len, come back to bed! School can wait!"  
>A few more glanced came over our way at this, including Gakupo, or should I say, Gakky-poo.<br>"Oh, good, you came back. Oh, a bit excited are you? I knew you'd be a great boyfrie-" Her voice trailed off into a mumble as she fell back into a deeper sleep, but not before Iroha had her phone out recording the whole thing.  
>"Right, this is going on Youtube."<p> 


	7. Day Six: The Beach Again

Would you look at that! An update at last. I'm just gonna blame Oliver for this, cause I brought him a month ago and he has distracted me from both this and the Spanish Speaking GCSE I am doing half of on Tuesday. Is it weird that I call a singing computer program "him"? Anyway, here's the update, and don't expect another one soon 'cause I've got the Spanish Writing part of the GCSE the week after next, and then general exams in everything. And then part of my History GCSE, on "Medicine through Time". I love exams, don't you.  
>As always, I own nothing but a burning hatred for exams.<p>

PS; If you don't know for some reason, like not being British, GCSE = General Certificate of Education, they're the exams you do at sixteen before you go to college. Except I get to do some early because apparently I'm gifted and talented. Not sure how.

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><p>On Friday, we had the day off again. Really, our school is crappy at staying open. This time, however, it was actually planning to be shut beforehand, so it wasn't so bad. Me, Neru, Rin and Mikuo took the opportunity to go to the beach. Again. Not that I was complaining- Neru in a bikini is not the sort of thing I might complain about. Seeing my sister, I'm neutral about. Seeing Mikuo shirtless is not exactly what one might call pleasant. Alas, I have no choice, so let's get to the interesting part. It was about half past ten and Neru was sunbathing, Haku next to her. I'm still not sure where she materialised from, but she brought Dell with her. Rin and Mikuo were fooling around in the sea (not like that!) and Teto was hiding in a nearby bush with binoculars staring at Dell. Iroha was stood next to said bush, looking bored. I was standing around with nothing to do, wondering how when I was stood on a beach with four hot girls nearby (in order of hotness, Neru, Iroha, Haku and Teto. What, you didn't think I was going to include my sister, did you?) and yet had nothing to do, in both senses of the word. Hah, I'm such a dirty pervert. Anyway, this was all incredibly boring, up until when Dell took his shirt off. Teto, being the incredibly stalkerish weirdo she is, was overcome with fangirlish glee and ran towards him, squeeing all the way. Haku, seeing this, jumped to her feet with incredible speed and rugby tackled Teto as she ran, all of this accompanied by a soundtrack of Iroha laughing her head off. Neru had her phone out, and so didn't notice.<br>"My boyfriend, no touchie!" Haku cried at the top of her voice as she held desperately onto one of Teto's pigtails.  
>"Must... Have... SIX-PACK!" Teto was screaming, drawing freaked out looks from innocent passers-by. Iroha had been distracted by a little girl who was lugging a massive Hello Kitty doll around, and seemed oblivious to everything happening. Just like Neru.<br>"Hey, fuckwipes!"  
>Teto tried to twist her head around to see Mikuo insulting us, but was still being held by Haku. Iroha quickly moved to cover the ears of the little girl with black hair and pigtails who she was crouched in front of, wallet out, trying desperately to get her to release the Hello Kitty doll she was clutching. It didn't seem to be working. Dell was taking the opportunity to run like hell... into Kaito. Kaito who was carrying a shitload of vanilla Haagen-Dazs ice cream. Which he dropped.<br>What happened next was too horrible to describe. It was like Kaito did to Dell everything Neru had done to me over the course of the week. Except far far worse. (The screams will haunt me for evermore)  
>By the time I dared to open my eyes again, Haku was lying on top of Dell, who was grinning like a psycho, and Teto was pulling on Kaito's scarf as he tried to charge towards the white-haired couple (or, perhaps, towards the ice cream next to them). Iroha was clutching a Hello Kitty doll and the girl she had stolen it from was crying.<br>"I never thought I'd find someone even smexier than Dell!" Teto cried.  
>Kaito wailed in horror, "No, please! I have a girlfriend! I'm not smexy! Someone help me!"<br>I half expected Miku to appear somewhere and start fighting Teto in an epic battle for Kaito's love (I think Haagen-Dazs beat them on that one), but, alas, no Miku. On the other hand, Neru. She's preferable.  
>"Hey, Len, might wanna go stop your sister losing her virginity over there."<br>Iroha has to ruin everythi- wait, losing her virginity? What? What? WHAT?  
>I glanced over to the sea to see (hah, the sea to see) Mikuo carrying Rin, bridal-style, towards the beach. She had her face buried in his neck, an embarrassment to the Kagamine family name. There were traces of red around his nose- remnants of a nosebleed, I think.<br>"Gakky-poo? Oh Gakky-poo? Wait for me before you start swimming!"  
>How come people turn up everywhere we go? It's weird and annoying.<br>"Uh, hi Len."  
>I spun in surprise, "Gah! Holy fuck, what is it with you people?" Piko Utatane stood there, looking nervous. As always.<br>"Neru, we're leaving! Now, before Mr Hiyama or someone shows up!"  
>"Someone said my name?"<br>"Stay away from me!"

Anyway, we very quickly made our escape and a few hours later, Rin decided the best course of action was shopping, as girls often do. Mikuo opted out of this, and I was not given an option. This was because I was the only one of us three with money. Before long we had caught the bus to the nearest shopping centre (or mall, to you Americans) and I was being dragged by Neru into- wait for it- wait for it-  
>A lingerie shop!<br>Hah, just kidding, we're probably too young to be allowed in one anyway. I was instead dragged into Jack Wills.  
>"Hey, Iroha, look it's Len!"<br>"Why are you here?"  
>"Kaito works here."<br>Teto is one creepy little stalker. Strangely silent, Iroha was clutching a Hello Kitty plush doll, the one she had taken from the little kid at the beach earlier, as if her life depended on it.  
>Neru nodded as if this was the most normal thing in the world, "Okay, well Len is gonna go buy me some clothes now, bye!"<br>"Bye!"Speaking of Neru, have I mentioned that she was the cutest thing in the world ever? If not, she was. Her hair was tied up like usual, in a side ponytail, and she wasn't wearing anything different to normal, she just looked strangely cute. Not that I don't say that everyday. If I don't mention it, just assume she is looking as cute as possible.  
>Anyway, moving on from my praising of Neru (I say anyway too much, don't I? Anyway, it's not important. Hah, I said it again! I don't know why I should be proud of that) and moving on from me talking far, far too much, Neru thrust three things into my hands. After staring at them for a second, I realised they were clothes.<br>"What do you want me to do with these?"  
>"Hold them, I'm trying to find some shorts that fit. Ah, here!"<br>She threw the pair of shorts at me, and I only managed to catch them because I am what? _A total badass!  
><em>Sorry, I just needed to tell you that. Moving on, I had to pay sixty quid for those. Sixty quid! I'm not made of money! Then, Rin arrived and made me buy her clothes, which cost another thirty-three pounds. Leaving me with seven out of a hundred pounds that I had brought with me. Mum and Dad are gonna kill us when they get back.


End file.
